So it has been so long since I wrote here that I even forgot the WordPress password. It had been so long since I ran that by the time I finished the parlous three miles last evening my heart was jumping out of my chest and it took me forever to cool down.
And that is how it happens. So easy to lapse into the habit of not doing.
The universe is unfair like that. Most of all that is good for you requires intention, concentration, decision-making and purposive action. And all the things that give easy comforts and delights, like idleness, languor, like eating cheese sticks and other assorted junk come so naturally, thoughtlessly. Clearly! And perhaps that is a matter of hardwiring, that, we are prone to inattention, to some levels of indolence, that staying put and mute can be a default condition.
Recently I read an article on what constitutes the meaningful life in the New York Times and was struck by the proposition that a meaningful life is more than a happy life or even a morally good one. Author Susan Wolf who is cited in the article thinks that a meaningful life must, in some sense, feel worthwhile. The person living the life must be engaged by it.
Hurtling down life’s road on the existential timer (and I have never had a year speed faster than from 50 to 51) this feeling of the need to be engaged in LIVING is quite acute. Yet paradoxically, my recent trend has been in the opposite direction.
Many years ago when ill-advisedly and without any intellectual intentionality I studied (and therefore failed) sciences, I came across the idea of entropy, (a thermodynamic law that of course I never understood in the scientific way) that there is a natural tendency to decay, disorder and disarray. Things do fall apart, and the centre will not hold unless…
The unless in science, for entropy to decrease, energy must be transferred from somewhere outside the disordered system.
And so fighting psychic entropy I guess requires rejuvenation, drawing inspiration from causes, from others, from nature. It also requires discipline, the discipline to force ourselves into the habit of meaningfulness and engagement in whatever spheres and spaces we inhabit.
My spin on entropy is that the more open the system, the less entropy there is … I’d say that you are good at creating spaces for dissipation, expansion, self organisation and self sustenance … people spend much time constructing reality rather than living it, each new frame creates margins, barriers, challenges, ‘power over’ … the best way to make life worthwhile I think (still in theory :)) is to abandon oneself to the mystery that is reality, it’s actually not the hard, tough, awfulness that we have invented … people spend lots of time ‘looking for god’ and ‘filling voids’, looking for ‘meaning’ as if an atom wasn’t intriguing enough, as if skin and speech, and ocean are just so ordinary, so easily understood as if love was such a by the way sort of experience, as if wi-fi and satellites are so common place, as if ‘Roberta’ was so common place! 🙂 …
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I definitely take your point. That living is itself extraordinary.
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i really enjoyed this post. i know u’ll find it again or fight it rather… u’ll make urself fight it… and so, find it in u – the good, positive, purposeful, inspired and seemingly elusive ‘it’ 🙂
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Habits of the mind, like any other habits are easily formed and hard to break.
Entropy in my view is the focus on the aspects of the cycle of nature that relate to breaking down and decay, when just around the bend is the new life and renewal aspect of the cycle. Where we put our attention is important to whether we focus on the break down, or the wonderful anticipation of the new life and opportunities that emerge.
One positive of the entropy phase is that it allows us to appreciate more deeply the renewal. The danger is that we become so absorbed by it that we miss the new buds and new life emerging.
Thanks Roberta for keeping us engaged.
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Use it or lose it!
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Hi Roberta,
Good to see that you are back in the groove. I was wondering why I had not seen anything from you for a while. I certainly hope that you will find the drive and the inspiration to continue on your route of doing what is good and right, healhwise and otherwise.
Love,
Auntie June
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Roberta,
Nice to hear from you and especially so since you still make the time to run a couple miles. And that’s the key to running at our age, make it simple.. run a couple miles a day , not a marathon.
So words like entropy are too complex for me, go to the beach or take a hike and enjoy life.
Dave
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Thanks Roberta. This struck a cord because I was having a discussion with one of my many nieces last night about living the life you want and settling for the life you’re living. Not that I have not be doing what comes easy…
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